In a fast-paced world where the internet dominates, it is easy to find several matches on online matrimony apps. But how about a match that turns into a relationship that lasts forever? Very few manage to pull this off, and our founder at Betterhalf, Pawan Gupta is one of them.
After 4 years of seeking a companion for life, 2 years into creating a matchmaking app, he finally stumbled upon the person meant for him! And this wedding season, the duo tied the knot on 11th December, 2020
Out of thousands of matches on Betterhalf, what made them click and how did they work it out?
The search
While Pawan was working in the USA, he had started the search for a potential life partner. He connected with many women in India, some working in the Americas. However, he had to tread a thorny path.
There were several rejections from prospective families and matches. Even I rejected a few women I met. The compatibility factor was missing. But in the end, I was exhausted emotionally and at one point, I felt like stopping this entire thing of seeking a partner, recollects Pawan.
He was not alone, this is what happened to many of his Indian friends who kept looking for a potential partner. After listening to such similar stories, he founded Betterhalf, enhancing the experience of matchmaking through artificial intelligence. Knowing its operations in and out, he considered trying his luck on the newly-found app.
“I was quite comfortable using the app. In fact I was among the top users on BetterHalf receiving maximum requests or highlights from recommended matching profiles – I didn’t tweak the matching algorithm in my favor but it was good to get some hope,” he says with a grin.
The match
Pawan was conversing with other women he had matched with on the app. But one day, he stumbled across the profile of Tanupriya (his wife). As they started talking, he felt they shared a great wavelength. There was a strong digital spark that bonded them together.
“Our compatibility and the rapport we share reinforced my belief in artificial intelligence predicting relationships,” he shares.
Pawan is a person who likes to spend time knowing about a person and there was still a lot left to know about Tanupriya. But somewhere in a corner of his heart, he knew he wanted to spend th rest of his life with her and just a month into this new relationship, he took matters further with parents. “There was no rush from my or her side but it was more towards the comfort of sharing life experiences with each other. I did not want us hanging in between in spite of knowing we are meant for each other,” says Pawan.
The connection
It has been two years since the couple met first and the journey was not only filled with bed of roses. They had their share of challenges. The first roadblock was that both were from different cities. Long distance is difficult especially while you are in the process of knowing someone. It was getting difficult for them to meet, explore and build the relationship during the initial days. But they were the couple who were determined to make things work. Both Tanupriya and Pawan were eager to go the extra mile to make the relationship matter.
We spoke on the app, then over calls, and everything happened organically. We started visiting each other over the weekends, made unplanned trips and decided to get engaged in the sixth month of seeing each other,” says Tanupriya, getting nostalgic.
But the stars were in their favour. Tanupriya was working in Hyderabad but had an on-shore client at Bangalore and Pawan had his startup based in Bangalore. She make trips to the city where possible and they both had fun discovering each other’s interests, pet peeves, fears and perspectives. “We did many short trips together, often unplanned ones around Bangalore during this time,” she adds.
Their families have been pillars of support with an equally binding force and they too adapted themselves to the modern ways of matchmaking. “Parents in India are moving away from the concept of rigid arranged marriages to love marriages which syncs well with what we promote at BetterHalf as well,” beams Pawan with pride.
Love balances
Pawan is a fitness enthusiast with daily running routines. He equally loves doing household chores and spends most of his time with office responsibilities (Oh yes! That’s how he rocks as a boss). But on the flipside, he sometimes places family priorities on a back seat but ever since he met Tanupriya, he has been working to improve on this aspect.
On the other hand, Tanupriya is quite good at managing family responsibilities which complements well with Pawan’s strengths. She is a dedicated person when it comes to her professional responsibilities and a pro in finance, and Pawan is already learning the ropes of becoming better at running the company and managing his personal finances.
“We both do understand that whatever we do together, family, health and our friends will be above what we do outside home. That’s what I like the most about us,” Pawan says.
After getting engaged, Tanupriya went on to pursue MBA for a year and a grand wedding was planned this year in May. But we all know how the pandemic dampened the spirits of thousands of couples in our country. So this brought in a further delay of 6 months. Unlike others, they are only happy about whatever happened. “All of this allowed us to know more about each other and make our foundations stronger.”
Finally, they are all set to end this gloomy year with glitz and celebrations of their wedding.
What a cool way to end the year that was full of downs!
How to smoothly take your relationship from online to offline – Tips from the newly-wed
- Online is a good medium to have a good pool of compatible partners quickly but relationships in the real world are hard to build and sustain. People shouldn’t rush considering they are yet to know the other person and hence, should interact online for sometime before opening up in the real world.
- This gives a sense of comfort and safety. Once you feel the spark and compatibility developing, take it offline.
- Once you are sure about the person, go for as many unplanned trips. That’s when you get to know the real person, their behaviour – likes/dislikes, personality and understand the long-term view of their relationship with you.
Unlike Bollywood stories, building and sustaining relationships is hard. Learn to give as much as you take in this bond. This is the most common mistake people make without understanding this basic thing.
