We all have been fostering connections online, seeking romantic relationships on Betterhalf or any other match-making apps. While most of us have been maintaining our relationships online, some have found a date but are waiting to meet that person for the first time IRL.
No matter how hard the lockdown was in different ways for us, we all learnt how to deal with uncertainty in life. And it is those lessons about uncertainty we need to keep in mind while approaching and moving forward with our quarantine loves.
Restaurants, cafes, bistros are opening up and with the festive season kicking in, it might be a perfect time to meet your quarantine date offline. The days leading to your first meeting can leave you feeling overwhelmed and nervous, and that is exactly when we at BetterHalf are going to help you with a few tips and hacks. Are you geared up?
No handshakes please
Everyone is sanitising hands, being cautious and taking all the safety measures. However, we don’t know where and how your date has travelled from and the last thing we want is getting infected by someone we might fall in love with. So please hold back on the urge for a friendly handshake for some more time till you know the person well enough to trust in their safety conditions.
Sanitise – ok – please!
Have quality conversations
A great conversation is a striking point of building a rapport and carrying forward your relationship outside the digital realms. Locked up in our homes for almost 8 complete months now, we have somewhere forgotten how having a conversation feels like, all thanks to virtual meetings. We have lost touch with expressions, body gestures and talking to a person face-to-face (mind you, the video cannot be turned off here!). Hence, having a nice chat over a cup of coffee is important. Get to know the opposite person and at the same time, open up to them. Read our blog on how to approach your date and get started with interesting talk points to keep the conversation natural and flowing.
Be prepared to be disappointed
It’s easy to idealise people before you meet them. You are constantly looking at their online persona and the mind builds its own picture of a person. It is only natural to imagine they are everything you’ve dreamed of and more, but remember that these thoughts have no basis in reality until you’ve actually met someone and got to know them a bit. During your first meeting, lower your expectations and be open to knowing who they really are and not who you want them to be. This is a good reason to take things offline pretty quickly, rather than spending more months or even a year chatting online and feeling the lack of chemistry seep in when you finally get to meet.
Don’t be creepy
Yup, you read that right, This point is of the most importance. Even if you two have been getting all lovey-dovey online, it is better to take that similar romantic thread here on the first meeting. Pay attention to what she/he’s said, posted, photographed and compliment them. But do not make sexually inclined comments even though you both were comfortable with it on the app. Real-life conversations are way different than just texting. So give it time to bloom on its own. Get to know how comfortable your partner is with moving this ahead. Better go slow than ruin something that has all potentials.
Meet at a public place like a cafe, restaurant, mall or a neighbourhood park. Do not accept to visit them at their home or invite them to yours. After chatting passionately online and connecting well, you might tend to feel that you know your date well. But online behaviours can be deceiving and it is better to be cautious than end up in mess. Share the location of your meeting with your best friend or a close cousin so that they know where you are and can reach you in case of an emergency. Remembering the connection you had online is one thing but also keep in mind that you will be meeting a stranger. It is better to start on a fresh note and not be depended solely on how far you guys have gone online.
Offline meeting, an extension of online dating
It is possible that you could change your mind after the first meeting in reality. You know it after the first hour or so if you both could gel well or are different in all aspects. In such cases, do not lead them on. At the same time, avoid ghosting. Everyone deserves a fair goodbye and you can balance it out by explaining how they are not a person you want to be in a relationship with.
On the other hand, if things work out and you really like them, don’t forget to keep in touch online. It is only normal to take things for granted especially when we all have hectic work schedules. So don’t wait till you meet for the second time, keep the online flow on.
It may seem that you have been chatting for over half a year and would want to rush into the relationship. But go slow. What you have uncovered about your date is just a tip of the iceberg. Meet often, open up and get to know each other well before you commit yourself and get too involved with your future life partner.